My mom recently sent me a link to a video by Brené Brown, Supersoul Sessions: The Anatomy of Trust. I’m new at the whole marriage thing, but as of the end of July 2019, my parents have been married 24 years. If my mom is suggesting it, you’re probably going to want to listen too.
Trust isn’t only a necessity in personal relationships, but should also be fostered in your professional relationships. “As revealed by a 2016 survey of CEOs by PWC, a strong majority of business leaders — 55%, to be exact — believe a lack of trust in the workplace constitutes a foundational threat to their company” (Forbes Contributor, William Craig).
The premise of the video underlines showing up for people, and building trust in the little moments. The little moments like doing the dishes, remembering an important detail about someone else, or simply humbling yourself enough to ask for help. According to Brown, those small moments are opportunities to either build trust or to betray. She defines betrayal as neglecting to use a small moment to build trust; a very black and white definition.
Although she may define betrayal very matter-of-factly, the same can’t be said for her definition of trust. Brown breaks down trust in order to help more easily target issues of (dis)trust. She calls the breakdown “BRAVING connection:”
- Setting boundaries
- Maintaining reliability
- Holding yourself and others accountable
- Keeping the vault locked
- Having integrity
- Practicing non-judgment
- Making generous assumptions
I won’t bother breaking each of the pieces in her acronym down. Brown can do a much better job speaking than I can of summarizing.
Finally, she concludes with an emphasis on building trust with yourself by taking time for self-care. In order to gain the trust of others, you first need to trust yourself. So do yourself a favor and take 25 minutes out of your day to listen to/watch this video.
Trust is choosing to make something important to you vulnerable to the actions of someone else.Charles Feltman